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I’ll Fix it Myself


July 15, 2011 by Annie McCormick

Last night my “significant other”, who I’ll call “Rodger”, came home with a request. “If I tell you something do you promise not to overreact?” was his question. Now how does a person respond to this? My first instinct was to overreact to the question alone, without finding out what he was going to tell me. We bargained back and forth for a while because I wanted to know what I wasn’t supposed to overreact to. Finally, after I promised not to overreact right away, he told me he had cut his leg on a piece of metal. After each piece of information; where, when, how, etc. I would say “okay, okay, okay.” I didn’t overreact but I was wondering what the two bags from Walgreen’s were all about.

Then he showed me the calf on his left leg. There was a nice bandage; neatly taped. He and I went to the bathroom to look at the cut. Under the neat bandage was a 3” long gouge. The kicker was that it was about a half inch deep and splayed open. I still did not overreact but, in support of my partner, calmly suggested that he go to the hospital to get the Grand Canyon looked at. He refused and proceeded to empty out the Walgreen’s stash. Bandages, Betadine, saline wash, triple antibiotic cream and various packages of bandages. Everything he needed to self-doctor his ‘cut‘.

It seems that he sliced himself on a piece of metal, and then duct taped a t-shirt around it to stop the bleeding. He went back to working on his motorcycle then drove to town to shop for bandages. I again suggested the ER, especially since he was obviously in shock. He said, “Nah, it’s only a cut“ and proceeded to cook supper.

About 7am the next morning he woke me up and told me that he probably should have a doctor look at it. Do I want to come? Now I was in shock. He drove to the hospital, but he wanted to get coffee before he checked in. He also stopped to talk with several people he knew. He got into triage quickly; the aide unwrapped his bandage. One thing you don’t want to see is a medical person’s eyes double in size when they look at your injury. Not a good sign. He got the Marty Feldman look from all of them and they all asked him why he didn’t come in right away. Because it was “only a cut”, but he might should get some antibiotics and a tetanus shot while he was there.

He got stitched up and sent home to heal. Now I need some time to heal. From being called a nag. The only thing that I hate more than him calling me a Yankee is being called a nag. Maybe it was because I gently suggested the hospital 45 times or so, or because I threatened to fix it with a slap of pig manure, duct tape and tree bark.

After all, I’m just trying to be supportive.



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