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February 15, 2012 by Annie McCormick

We went to lunch yesterday.  It was a nice enough restaurant and pretty empty.  Just a few tables away were two couples enjoying their lunch.  The problem is that their way of enjoying their meal made it pretty un-enjoyable for me.

Even though we were far enough apart, their loudness made it possible for us to hear their conversation. A conversation that consisted of comments on passing wind. Twice the ancient custom of pulling-the-covers-over-her-head was voiced.  They all laughed heartily as I made great effort to chew and swallow my food. The other topic was of a sexual nature. I don’t think I’ve heard the phrase “Roman hands and Russian fingers” since seventh grade.

At one point, one of the women announced that she had to go to the bathroom. Her feller actually said, “Don’t fall in.” I made a bet my husband that when she returned the man would say, “Everything come out ok?” I was sure that was a solid bet, but the guy let me down.

I try to find entertainment wherever I can.

When they left, all four of them squeeze into a truck and burned rubber in the parking lot. Let me emphasize … they were not teenagers. They probably had teenagers of their own. I shudder to think of how that branch of the family tree acts in public.



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