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CHANGE OUR STATE BIRD?

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February 18, 2013 by wcobserver

Joe Neal

CONCERNING THE PROPOSAL TO CHANGE OUR STATE BIRD

In Arkansas politics, change is in the air. So of course I’ve been worried the current Arkansas Legislature might act to change our state bird from Northern Mockingbird to . . . well . . . what?

If the Arkansas Legislature gets involved, things won’t stop at just naming a new state bird.

First they would pass law mandating that we bird watchers on campus or church grounds carry concealed weapons, but of course, only if we want. I do currently carry a concealed audio recording device. Is that lethal enough?

If you are having trouble visualizing, imagine Joe Neal as Dirty Harry, with a pistol in my pocket. Oops, I mean Sony digital recorder.

If we wish to cast a ballot on changing the state bird, we would first present a state-mandated ID to prove our citizenship. Amazing. I’ve gotten by SIX DECADES without one! I had no idea Arkansas was in such danger from voter fraud!

Superman and Supergirl both face threats from this law. Imagine if Legislative investigators discover the kryptonite!

If we are retired and become ill at the time for casting the ballot on changing the state bird, no Federal medicare funds associated with The Great Evil, Obamacare, could be accepted in payment for our medical expenses.

Take that Prez O! We Arkies don’t need no help from our already paid up Federal taxes.

Finally I’m soothed and feel great relief the current self-proclaimed “small government” Legislature stays busy adding layers of government in all they touch. Like varnish on fine furniture.

Next up, mandatory prayer and a mandatory love offering for our precious Ayatollah . . oops, I mean, Legislature.

It will be many years before they can reach for bird. Ole mocker is safe for this session.

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1 comment »

  1. Alan Breedlove says:

    Mr. Neal, I would like to discuss several recent sightings of an unidentifiable, hawk like bird. Could please respond to my email or call at 479-409-7843. Thank you.

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