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Honey, Call Our Broker


March 10, 2013 by wcobserver

A document appeared in the Council Packet for the March meeting that ignited our already volatile imagination.  The form business letter from “Wall Street International” was sent in error according to the person we spoke with at the number provided.  No mention of the letter was made in the Agenda so we wonder why it was cluttering up the packet, in the first place.

The letter opened with “Dear Butch, I have tried twice to reach you in reference to …” Right away one knew this guy didn’t know much about West Fork or he would have known how to reach Butch; try Jakes.  The brief letter continued, “…in reference to an Ohio based buyer who wants to open up immediate negotiations to buy all or part of West Fork City Hall,” and gave a number to call.

Sell City Hall? The idea brought to mind a “humorous fabrication” article in the Washington County Observer’s April Fool Edition on March 31, 2011.

West Fork Vote Dissolves City

 In a town that’s never short of surprises the West Fork City

Council in a surprise special session last night voted unanimously

to dissolve the town and return it to the county. The

vote came as a surprise to even some council members. Several

stated in interviews with the Observer after the meeting

that they thought the vote was a vote of “no confidence” for the


 “I knew they were having some problems but this is a complete

surprise,”  said Wes Fork resident Ben H. Long.

 Recently, elected Mayor Hime said she was disappointed with

the vote but added, “Oh well, I’ve got plenty of other things to


 After the short meeting, council member Charles Rossetti held

spontaneous press conference on the sidewalk outside city hall

and announced his candidacy for Washington County Justice of

the Peace.

Council member Ed Stout had no comment.

Attorneys for the city will draft necessary legal documents…

That article, we learned later, prompted at least one city employee, not recognizing the hoax, to apply for employment at another city.

Somehow, the idea of dissolving West Fork and returning it to the county has lingered and surfaces occasionally when the topic of the town’s dysfunctionality comes up. This could help explain the wild eyed emotional resistance by some West Fork citizens to the West Fork Initiative Group’s effort to bypass the sluggish council and take critical issues straight to the voters.

Could an initiative be placed on the ballot to dissolve West Fork? Could the town dissolve the police department and bring in deputy sheriffs, privatize the parks and community center, continue the independent fire association, and sell the water system to a private water company? Can we sell the assets and divide the loot amongst us?

We would still have a West Fork zip code, still have a school district and still have a past.

Why not?




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